If it would only last forever...

A few things that I cherish everyday with Parker that I wish would last forever:

How he goes and gets a book and then walks over to me with it and as I open it, he crawls into my lap and waits anxiously for me to begin reading.

How at night when I rock him- he wraps his legs around my waist, his arms around my arms and lays his head on my chest as I sing to him.

How when he is outside walking around and he gets to what I call "BIG step, Parker"- he looks up at me and extends his hand to mine so that I can help him up and down the big steps of his little world.

How when he is upset, for whatever reason, he comes up to me and holds onto my legs and longs for me to pick him up.

I know that one day, my little man will grow up and no longer need me the way he does now. I know that he will one day fall in love with another woman and she will take the spot of #1 in his heart- but right now- I will cherish being his mommy- and I will cherish everyday I get with my little man, and I will cherish being needed for the "big steps" of his life.

A Much Needed Day

Well, today was a much needed day in every form of the phrase, and here is why:

First, I began my day with a door bell ring at 7:45am and my sweet mother-in-law had sent her house cleaning lady who was standing at my door ready to clean my house from top to bottom; EVERY-SQUARE-INCH! Oh what a sight for sore eyes.

Second, Parker and I left this beautiful cleaning lady to go over to see my grandparents for a crab legs and shrimp lunch. Now, as much as I LOVED the food, it was the date with my grandparents that I loved more. They will be 88 this May- and even though their mind is still in their 60's, their bodies are showing their age. I don't know how long I am going to have my grandparents in my life, but I never once want to regret not spending time or showing/telling them how much I love them, when my Lord decides to bring them home.

On the way home, Parker and I stopped off at the neighborhood park by our house. We stayed and played and Parker roamed around exploring every little square inch of that park. We went up the play gym and then slid down the slide...Parker squealing and laughing; grinning ear-to-ear as we slid down that slide. I hope I can brand that image into my mind.

After dinner it was off to bath time. I do love bath time, but there is a part in his bath book where I hold my hand up and then SPLASH it into the water to go along with the book. Well, tonight, he expected it!! He got really excited and closed his eyes and then after the splash, he stuck his hands up in the air and SPLASHED!!! The most fun part, is that we would get into splashing wars- and after the walls, toilet, floor and mirror were all splashed with water- bath time was over.

Once Parker had his PJ's on- we went into the living room where I usually watch TV and he walks around and plays for the little bit of time before bed- but tonight he was SO GRUMPY. I thought "Hmm...Parker, are you going to make it to 7 or will this be a 6:30 bedtime night?". We went in his room and that is where I realized that all he wanted was for me to sit down with him and let him play while I watched. I would then grab him and lay on my back and fly him through the air...he laughed so hard, he got the hick-ups...then we tickled and played and flew and tickled. It was so fun. As the night wound down and his eyes began to get droopy I sat him in my lap and put his head on my chest and sang...it was all history from there.

The point of the blog- is to remind me that the beautiful things in life are still there. It is so easy to forget while I am going through this first trimester of pregnancy and I am SO exhausted and I don't feel good and my motivation for anything in life is gone...today reminded me that life is still so so good and even though this short period of time, my physical energy does not match my mental/emotional energy, this will pass, but I can't let these little joys in life such as today pass me by.

TODAY, was a much needed day!!!

I found his giggle spot

Tonight- before it was time for Parker to go to bed- we were sitting on the couch- Parkerman on my lap facing me. I would say "upside down" and he would bend backwards and look at the TV upside down- then bring his head back up and smile at me...we did this a few times and when he bent his head back to look at the TV I found his tickle spot! Now, my son is ticklish ALL OVER- and will laugh anywhere he is tickled- but under his chin on his neck is the prem-o of tickle spots! I started to tickle his exposed neck when he was looking upside down and he laughed like I haven't seen him laugh before! In return- I laughed- then he laughed, then I laughed.....oh my goodness...what a fun never-ending cycle!!!

A Year in Review

Wow- tomorrow morning at 8:58am it will be one year since our little love bug entered this world. I think back where I was this time last year and it's amazing what has gone on...

February 2, 2009 Blake and I were spending our "last night" as "just us" together. I was panic stricken as I could NOT imagine that life with a baby would be blissful and fun- and I just KNEW that Blake and I would no longer have the love we had for each other because everyone said that once you have a baby, your life (and marriage for that matter) would be "over"...by over I meant no excitement, no fun, etc.

February 3, 2009- 8:58am I hear the first cry of my baby boy entering the world- what a beautiful sound! (at least to us it was :) )


One month: Falling more in love every day...thinking how could I love any other stage more than this one:

Two Months: He smiled for the first time, and got to go to the church nursery for the first time! Also- got his first cold! Yuk!
Three Months: Really smiling now!! We are having SO much fun! He also laughed out loud this month, rolled over and went swimming for the first time!

Four Months: Starting to become a REALLY happy baby...his little personality is starting to come alive! His hands are ALWAYS in his mouth during this stage!

Five Months: Can life get any better than this stage? Barely starting to sit up...

Six Months: We had a six month birthday party where he got to try rice cereal for the first time!!! Sitting up on his own

Seven Months: He got his 1st two teeth!!!

Eight Months: Got to experience his first Halloween...he was a sock monkey!

Nine Months: Watch out...he is crawling!!!! He got his top two teeth and first hair cut...as you can see, he needed one!


Ten Months: He is starting to eat table food..i.e. not just baby food or mashed up table food...now that he has good teeth he can chew a lot!!He is also starting to learn how to walk! He also got to experience his first Christmas!

Eleven Months: Got his first molar! Whew! He is now a walking man!!


Twelve Months: Coming Soon.....


This baby boy changed my world and by change I mean for the better! My heart opened up to love another human being in a way that I NEVER imagined. I fell in love with my husband in a way that I never imagined and I began a life playing a new role that would be more fulfilling than anything I have ever done. The fear of my new life I had the night before Parker entered this world was all a myth...I can't imagine my life without Parker in it and I would never want to imagine it.

I love you, baby boy! Happy Birthday!

I wouldn't trade it for the world...cha cha cha

(Sung to the tune of La Cucaracha)
For a big, huge house,
Or for a super nice car...
I wouldn't trade it for the world,
For a lot of cash,
Or lots of nice clothes...
I wouldn't trade it for the world,
For nice jewelry,
or for nice restaurants...
I wouldn't trade it for the world,
For a high rise,
or a high paid job....
I wouldn't trade pulling my baby boy in his red wagon for the world. cha cha cha...(this line didn't quite go with the song tune...but hey, you can make it work)

Yes- I sung this to Parker yesterday as I am pulling him in his new red wagon. I am pulling him and he is saying his only true word that he knows...."uh-oh" and then I would repeat "uh-oh" and he would repeat "uh-oh" and we went on and on. It was such a moment....I am so grateful that I can be the one to talk to him as he learns new words- I am so glad that these little moments that would seam boring to someone else are moments that fill my heart with joy. I am so glad that we get the opportunity to experience life together....just mommy and Parker...and of course our favorite daddy when he gets home from conquering the world for us. :)

I wouldn't trade it for the world...

A new addition

Yesterday, January 26, 2010 I found out that I am expecting baby #2! What a shocker that was!!! On Monday, January 25th, I took a $.99 pregnancy test that I bought at Dollar General- it came back negative. As I was out walking with some neighbor moms on Tuesday, I was telling them that I had thought I was pregnant, but not to worry- my $.99 test cleared it up for me! One of the moms looked at me with this serious look and said "I wouldn't be so sure...it took my sister FIVE of the $.99 tests before it told her she was pregnant!".....WHAT??? Well, this mom happened to have a spare pregnancy test on hand and passed it over to me- I promptly went in and took it, and this is what I got:


Whew...Blake was at work and I had Parker and our neighbor's little girl, Liv, over here and I began pacing around- taking deep breaths in and saying to myself "okay...I am pregnant...okay...I'm pregnant...I'm pregnant". Blake got home- I showed him this picture and enjoyed the look of disbelief and then excitement after hearing the day before I was NOT pregnant!

It was so exciting- but now the countdown begins. I have 9 months to cherish, enjoy and soak in every minute with JUST my little baby boy. I have 9 months to seek out every opportunity to cuddle, love on, play trucks with and go to the park with JUST Parker. My absolute joy, and love of my life....how could I possibly love another baby as much as I love my little man? It is unimaginable to me to think about- but I know that I will love and cherish this new baby just as much, but it's just hard to truly believe that!

However, when fear and anxiety about this new adventure well up in my mind and my heart I have to remember how this all began. On October 30, 2009, Blake and I decided to quit preventing pregnancy. We decided that we were not going to prevent- but if GOD wanted to prevent He could. We gave up the conception of another child COMPLETELY into God's hands and God's perfect timing. We prayed that God would allow me to conceive when HE knew it was the perfect time and when HE knew I as a mother and Blake as a daddy would be able to handle it. So here we are now....I am pregnant....God's perfect timing- I must trust and be at peace with. So- here we are...all 4 of us :) God is good- now we have to just pray and trust that the little baby in my belly is growing into a healthy baby boy or girl- and focus on this wonderful time with just the 3 of us!

One of my moments...

Today was too gorgeous not to go for a walk. I loaded Parkerman into his stroller and we went walking- on our way back towards the house we stopped off at the park so that I could experience one of my favorite moments. I picked Parker up and sat him on my lap facing me- I sat down on a swing and he laid his cheek on my chest and we just experienced life for a moment- quiet and peaceful- with each other. I kissed him on the top of his head and looked out at God's beautiful creation hoping that I could soak in the moment so that I could never forget it. Even though Parker was a handful today- kind of fussy- a little irritable- that moment on the swing washed all of my frustration away and reminded me that even when things aren't perfect- I can still have perfect moments with my little love bug.