It sold.....IT SOLD!!!

So, today is Tuesday, May 7th.  On Wednesday, May 1st we listed the house.  That evening we had our first showing and that night we received word that once the wife saw it on Friday, May 3rd, they would be putting in an offer of "asking price but with $5,000 for their closing costs".  Blake and I looked at each other with a look of "mmmm...I don't think so".  Well, Friday comes along and we got our house beautifully cleaned and we moved to my in-laws for the weekend so that our house would STAY clean for showings.  That couple came back and sure enough an offer comes across the table for "asking price with $2500 for their closing costs".  They already talked themselves down $2500.  Interesting!  So, our realtor sent over a statement showing all of the fees we would have to pay and what our final take home would be with that offer.  Blake and I almost fell over.  We did not realize that realtor fees along with taxes and then now the $2500 for closing would just eat away our profit!!  SO, we knew right away we would not be taking that offer...we needed asking price...PERIOD!  Our realtor was a little stunned that we wouldn't take this fantastic offer and apparently the buyers were too, but Blake and I decided that on Monday, May 6th, we would decide what to do...we would be silent and wait out the weekend.  Our realtor then told us that was such a risky move as the buyers told him they were so ready to buy and they were going out on Saturday to find a house and were prepared to make an offer on another house.  "You might lose this offer"!  Well, immediately fear crept in my mind..."are we being greedy???", "is this stupid???"..."this really is a great offer".  But as Blake and I talked $2500 would pay for one whole semester of seminary...we needed every bit of help to pay for his degree.  Blake was confident, so I just rested in his lead.

On Saturday, May 4th, I was driving home to check on the house...continuing to pray pray pray over Blake's wisdom, and the house sell and the buyers, and I just started getting overwhelmed with this whole process.  Then, the Holy Spirit moved...."The Lord will fight for you, all you must do is be silent" (Exodus 14:14)...all I must do is BE SILENT.  Well, that is exactly what HE, MY GOD, did.  Blake and I were silent all weekend- then on Monday, May 6th, we countered back with full price- no closing costs.  They accepted!  June 14th is our closing date.  Wow, there it is.  Less than a week, we quietly let God work out all of the details...to GOD be the glory, GREAT things HE has done!

Sobbing turned to joy...

"They accepted your offer!!" was the text I received Monday at 2pm.  Tears welled up in my eyes as I put my face in my hands and sobbed.  I looked around at our house, "this is it...this home...all these blissful years...we are moving".  My eyes were puffy all day as at the drop of a hat, tears would flow.  I texted my prayer warriers, and of course my parents.  I couldn't talk to my mom when she texted back "do you want to talk about it?".  I couldn't even read the text without crying.  My parents...the thought of moving away from them, it's soooo hard.  It's not like I see them every day, but I'm still their little girl...I didn't realize leaving them would hit me the way it did...I just love them so much.  Tears are rolling down my face now, just typing about it!  ha!  Anyways- I have been so somber the past two days- focusing more on my sacrifice that the incredible GIFT that God is giving us for the opportunity to serve HIM!!!  God has just blessed me so much recently through people sending me passages to read in His word...when I do...He always tells me something...it has been such a huge blessing.  Well, today I got several passages from a dear friend and one of them was Deuteronomy 28.  The first part talks about the massive BLESSING you receive from obedience.  It's MASSIVE...He will BLESS BLESS BLESS!  Well, I was getting all pumped, because here we are making this HUGE step of obedience...ok Lord....I'm ready for my blessing!!  Then, I went over to the part of the passage about what happens when you are disobedient.  As I am reading through it, I was SO GLAD I was living in obedience...it's scary to be on the disobedience side!  Well, then it hit me like a ton of bricks....the part of the passage that says, "They shall be a sign and a wonder against you and your offspring forever.  Because you did not serve the LORD your God with joyfullness and gladness of heart, because of the abundance of all things," (Deut. 28:46-47)  Whoa...God, I am walking around moping, crying, saying "poor me"...that's not joyfullness and GLADNESS OF HEART!!!  I realized obedience is a matter of the heart....and my heart was not in obedience!  Ouch!  Forgive me Father...my Abba Father, forgive me.  My heart was not joyfully serving you with gladness.  I must move forward, praising Him, thanking HIM for the BEAUTIFUL blessings He gives me every-single-day...and most importantly THANK him for the BLESSING of serving HIM!

The pool...

One of my beautiful answers to prayer in all of this move stuff, is that I wanted to be able to enjoy the pool before we sell the house and lose access to it.  God, my Abba Father, has given me the most BEAUTIFUL of perfect days at the swimming pool!!!  Today, we spent 4 hours in bliss...me and the boys...having an absolute blast at the pool!!  My goal was to spend every day there for at least a little bit of time..well, due to weather, I haven't been there everyday, but just about!!!  God is good...He gave me such a wonderful day!!  Thank you my Abba Father!

Who, me?

Last night, I was talking to Blake about how NOT qualified or capable I was for the job of "missionary".  We both made small comments about how "yes, but God is the one who will do it" and then we went to bed.  Well, today I got a beautiful opportunity to have my quiet time and I was reading a verse my sweet friend encouraged me to read in Judges chapter 6.  Well, it was all about Gideon and how the Angle of the Lord came to him and told him to defeat the Mideonites and deliver the Israelites.  Gideon basically said "who me??? I am the most unqualified person in the most unqualified clan".  But the angle of the Lord told him "yes, but I will do it through you"....the Holy Spirit moved in my heart.  I have been called to something I am so unequipped to do...I feel sometimes I will be more of a hindrance than a help!  ha!  But God moved in my spirit...it's HIM doing it through me and because of my weakness HE will gain ALL GLORY! 

The lasts...

Well, this is the week that from the minute I knew about this calling, I have been dreading.  The week that we move out of Blake and my first home as a couple, the home we brought our children home to and now our home that holds so many blissful memories.  I must say, God has held me up.  As I have been packing, sadness has not encompassed me the way I thought it would and by Sunday (June 9th) I was wondering if it ever would hit. 

Well, yesterday, it hit.  I was wiping out an empty cabinet in my kitchen when all of a sudden sorrow just poured over me.  I sobbed tears of mourning as I envisioned someone else putting their things in this cabinet and someone else calling this home their's.  I was at that sobbing point for the rest of the evening and the next morning.  The tiniest of thoughts could hit my mind and the tears would pour out.  That afternoon I went before the Lord, "Father, Abba, you MUST do something.  I know I am living in obedience, yet I cannot live in mourning this whole week.  You must take these sentimental attachments completely away."...this is what I prayed.  I immediately felt His peace coming over me...my eyes dried up and I began to regain control over my volitial emotions.  Praise GOD!!! 

Now, as I sit here and type I am exhausted.  My body physically aches and my "insides" are so worn out from being on guard all week.  I secretly wish, or publically wish, Jesus would just come back :)  However, I rest in this Blessed Assurance...that "Christ has regarded, my helpless estate and hath shed His own blood for my soul".  It-IS-WELL....with-my-soul!!!!

Funny Parker post...

Parker is just like me in the fact that he is EXTREMELY sentimental.  The other day, there was a dead worm in the street and ants were eating it.  Parker was so distressed over it.  "Why are the ants eating it, mommy???"...."Well, Parker, in the animal world, when an animal dies, other animals eat the body...that's what the ants are doing...it's natural".  That did not satisfy his tender heart towards this worm.  After a long time of just watching it- he brushed the ants off and screamed with blissful joy that he had made the ants stop eating it.  Then he picked up the worm and declared that he was bringing it inside so no more ants could eat it..he was rescuing it.  Well, I was able to convince him to put it in the dirt where it would be safe...he was satisfied and his precious heart could rest :).  I love that boy- I love his precious, compassionate heart.

Beckham

Oh my sweet ham of a Beckham!!

-The other day, he wanted me to lay in bed with him at night...so I laid down next to him and he put his arm around me.  Loooooved that.
-Love how he calls his blanky "beee beee".  So now, we all call it that.  He will say "Maaa beee beee"...translation "my blanky"  :)
-Love how he streams a million words together into a whole conversation and I might only understand 4 words.
- When he wants me to rock him he will say "Mama wock me" or "dada wock me".
-When he wants me to watch him do something he will yell "MEEEEEEE" and when I look at him he will perform
-I love how he calls Parker "ker-ker"
-Every single morning, without fail, he wants to snuggle on the couch after breakfast and watch cartoons.  So he will say "nuuuuuuudul, mama", so I will sit on the couch and he will sit in my lap with his bee bee...it's pretty much heaven.  One of my morning faves :)
-If he wants you to hold him, he will say snuggle...or "nuuuuuudul".  :)
-At the swimming pool, when he gets cold, he will get out and lay down flat on the concrete to warm himself up.  :) :) :)  Soooo cute!
-When he is upset, typically me just holding his hand will make him happy...especially in the car when he is upset about something.

This little boy, he has my heart.  I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE him!!!!!!